My Professional Background - Once upon a time, I wanted to be a motivational speaker. Actually, I was a professional motivational speaker for about 5 years.:

I give it a week before WebMD confirms this is an actual condition.

And then a drug company picks up on it and develops a medicated cream called Prescription Scribeoflex.

And then some lab rats develop extra appendages or something totally bizarre.

And then there’s a class-action lawsuit against aforementioned drug company because they didn’t disclose it.

And then I become famous as “the face” of the worst drug commercial in history.

And then I get depressed and gain 200 pounds.

And then I lose a bunch of weight eating nothing but dried fruits and vegetables.

And I redeem my career as the spokesmodel for the Ronco Electric Food Dehydrator.

And then TLC does a reality show wherein I lose all credibility…again.

And then I gain 200 pounds…again.

But then lose it by taking Prescription Scribeoflex–which is now sold as a weight-loss drug.

And then Katie Couric, Ellen and Oprah interview me to talk about my tell-all book entitled “Katy Konfidential.”

And then I start my own jewelry line for people with extra appendages.

And then Kim Kardashian becomes my best friend.

THIS is the American Dream, people!


Comments to "Acute Blogger’s Elbow"

  1. Phinesley

    March 6, 2013

    So cute!

  2. Karmen

    March 7, 2013

    That is hilarious!

  3. KateHall

    March 7, 2013

    Hilarious! I tweeted it.

  4. Pingback: Do You Suffer From Blogger Elbow?


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