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My Professional Background - Once upon a time, I wanted to be a motivational speaker. Actually, I was a professional motivational speaker for about 5 years.:

I give it a week before WebMD confirms this is an actual condition.

And then a drug company picks up on it and develops a medicated cream called Prescription Scribeoflex.

And then some lab rats develop extra appendages or something totally bizarre.

And then there’s a class-action lawsuit against aforementioned drug company because they didn’t disclose it.

And then I become famous as “the face” of the worst drug commercial in history.

And then I get depressed and gain 200 pounds.

And then I lose a bunch of weight eating nothing but dried fruits and vegetables.

And I redeem my career as the spokesmodel for the Ronco Electric Food Dehydrator.

And then TLC does a reality show wherein I lose all credibility…again.

And then I gain 200 pounds…again.

But then lose it by taking Prescription Scribeoflex–which is now sold as a weight-loss drug.

And then Katie Couric, Ellen and Oprah interview me to talk about my tell-all book entitled “Katy Konfidential.”

And then I start my own jewelry line for people with extra appendages.

And then Kim Kardashian becomes my best friend.

THIS is the American Dream, people!

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Comments to "Acute Blogger’s Elbow"

  1. Phinesley

    March 6, 2013

    So cute!

  2. Karmen

    March 7, 2013

    That is hilarious!

  3. KateHall

    March 7, 2013

    Hilarious! I tweeted it.

  4. Pingback: Do You Suffer From Blogger Elbow?

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