Quantcast

Tags Archives

You are currently viewing all posts tagged with humor.
The "Weight" of Motherhood

In case you’ve never made the mistake of telling a toddler that Christmas is coming soon, I’ll give you a quick lesson in cognitive development.

Toddlers have NO concept of time. None.

In fact, toddlers have no sense of any type of measurement. We made the mistake of telling JJ a few weeks ago that he has grown so much recently and that he’ll soon be taller than daddy.

“Soon,” we said . . . like a bunch of stinking amateurs.

Read more →

First World Problems

Since Brian and I made the decision to homeschool our little ones, I have kept my eyes and ears open for opportunities to broaden our kids’ experiences outside the home. Read: I may start eating paint chips if we spend all day every day inside the house. Thankfully, we live extremely close to Kansas City, which is full of great, educational ways to entertain the kids.

Read more →

How to Post #TBT Photos Like a Celebrity

I poured through my photos yesterday (Thursday) in an attempt to come up with the perfect TBT photo. Dad, since I know you’ll ask, TBT (Throwback Thursday) is when people post old photos of themselves on social media or blogs. Not old as in, “Check out my crow’s feet in this photo,” but old like, “Hey, check out my ALF t-shirt.”

I have plenty of pictures of both, by the way. 

Read more →

Motherhood: Got Earplugs?

For as long as she has had the ability to speak, Averi has referred to yogurt as “dodoke” (pronounced dough-doke). And since I’m a lousy mom with little concern for my child’s cognitive or social development, I don’t bother to correct her.

“Sure, sweetheart, I’ll get you some sugar-and-chemical-filled dodoke. Just let mommy finish her mid-morning nap first. Oh, and can you hand me that lit candle and the lighter fluid while you’re at it?”

Read more →

Celebrity Doppelganger

I think one of the most difficult aspects of blogging for me isn’t the writing, the photo editing, the video editing, or the constant need to be “in the know” technologically. No, the most difficult part for me is this black hole time waster called the Internet.

I spend at least 75% of my dedicated blog time asking myself the question, “Why in the WORLD am I reading this?”

[Funny, I often ask myself that same question while here on this blog.]

Read more →

How to Drive Your Parents Crazy: Toddler Edition

They’re baaaaaaaaaaaack!

[What’s back?]

The McRib sandwich at McDonald’s!

I’m just kidding. I’ve never eaten a McRib in my life. But if you’re a fan, I did find this handy dandy website that records McRib “sightings” all across our great nation.

You can thank me in 15 years when all 70 McRib ingredients have processed out of your colon.

Read more →

Play Imitating Life

JJ spent the morning “driving Miss Averi” all around their pretend Kansas City in our living room.

“Averi, do you want to go to Union Station and play with Thomas the Train?”

“Yesssss!”

“You do? Well, sorry. It’s closed.”

Read more →

This post is not as much for the entertainment of my loyal readers as it is solid evidence for JJ to produce when his future therapist asks the question, “So when exactly did the nightmares begin?”

JJ will pull up his shirt sleeve to reveal the smartphone imbedded on his forearm. He’ll say, “Siri, show me the photo.”

Read more →

theking

It occurred to me recently that our kids have been pretty isolated this winter—what with all the infectious diseases, hazardous road conditions, bone-chilling temperatures, and 50-mile-an-hour winds.

You know, all the typical signs of the apocalypse. 

Did you know that Al Gore freezing over is the 5th sign? Let’s just hope he wasn’t in Atlanta this past week or Kirk Cameron will have to make a movie about it. (In case you’re keeping track, that’s a religious, a political, a geographical, and a pop culture joke all rolled into one.)

[Please tell me she doesn’t think Kirk Cameron is representative of current pop culture.]

I just went so far off track I don’t even remember where I was going with this… Oh! Stir-crazy. That’s where I was.

Read more →

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox

Join other followers: