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My Professional Background - Once upon a time, I wanted to be a motivational speaker. Actually, I was a professional motivational speaker for about 5 years.:
Operation Bananagrams, Bag O' Letters

You know when you watch news coverage of inclement weather–a hurricane, for instance–and there’s always that one, special kind of idiot who decides they will brave the storm? And then the rescue workers have to risk their lives to save this person from their own stupidity? And the person is all, “Wow! Thank you so much for saving my life. I only had 72 hours to evacuate, and I didn’t think it would be THAT bad…even though the educated minds at The Weather Channel predicted 175-mile-an-hour winds with cars and houses flying through the air.”

Yeah, that’s me.

It’s funny because I’m not the type to generally brave inclement weather. But, yesterday, I was DETERMINED to get to Target for something very important. Something I couldn’t find at home that would make round two of this Snowmageddon bearable:  Bananagrams.

Yes, I risked my life and the safety of my fellow motorists for a banana-shaped bag full of plastic letters.

Because I’m a rebel like that.

Actually, that’s not even remotely accurate. I’m the biggest weather wuss that ever lived. If I so much as hear a gust of wind, I text my best friend (who is a broadcast meteorologist) and ask when I should hole up in the basement and surround myself with mattresses. I think she considered changing her number when we moved to Kansas.

Well, too bad, Weather Girl! I’ve got your number. And if you change it, I’ve got your address.

(Seriously, I pretty much set myself up for a restraining order every time I write a blog post.)

After we left the emergency room yesterday morning (I’ll explain that one another day), I made my way into what I later discovered was the eye of the storm. This is what it looked like from inside our truck:

Operation Bananagrams, The Drive

And before you’re all, “That’s not too bad if you’re driving a truck,” I’ll let you know that it has REAR WHEEL drive. Which means that if you so much as attempt the icy drive-through at Chick-fil-A, you’ll fishtail into the side of the building. So, it’s a good thing I parked (read: slid until I stopped) and went inside. Whew! Dodged a lecture from my husband on that one.

Y’all, I will brave anything for a bag full of plastic letters and some waffle fries.

Fortunately, I made it home safely–though I was a bit shaken up from all the fishtailing and fear of ending up in a ditch with very little diet lemonade remaining.

Operation Bananagrams, Help Me

I made it all the way to our driveway on post, and then this happened:

Operation Bananagrams, Skating Rink

Yup. That is my husband’s handiwork. That is what happens when you get a Southerner to plow your driveway. You end up with a three-foot wide skating rink.

So, I braved the eye of the snowstorm, fishtailed through the ice-filled parking lot at Target and Chick-fil-A, drove 30 minutes back to post, and then got stuck at the base of my driveway and almost crashed into my precious minivan.

I was pretty happy about it.

I think our neighbors heard me yelling from inside the truck.

So, for his poor snow shoveling skills, I plan to mercilessly destroy my husband at Bananagrams today. As soon as he plows the additional foot of snow that just fell on our driveway.

Maybe the neighbor kids should bring their ice skates.

And then maybe Honey Boo Boo will show up.

Operation Bananagrams, Honey Boo Boo

(Yet another story for another day.)

UPDATE:

I kid you not, while I was writing this post, our awesome neighbor from across the street came over and cleared our driveway and walkway with an electric snow blower. Which confirms my earlier theory that they heard me screaming at my husband from inside the truck yesterday.

For that, dear neighbor, I will share my peanut butter cookies…with your family of seven. Seven.

(…Which then leaves me four. I think I can make it through the day with only four, colossal cookies. I love our neighbors, but WHY do they have so many kids? I may have to venture back into the snow tomorrow for more. I would totally risk my life again for peanut butter cookies.)

Operation Bananagrams, Om Nom Nom

What would you “risk your life to get in a snow storm?

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Comments to "Operation Bananagrams"

  1. Heather Hunter

    February 26, 2013

    Nothing! Driving in snow/ice is awful (says the girl who was stuck in a hotel for a week during the winter storm that hit Atlanta in 2010). The only time I drove while at the hotel was to go out and get Moe’s…so I guess Moe’s! That was a pretty scary trip, though, because I ended up sliding backwards trying to go uphill to get there. I’m surprised I didn’t choke on a chip once I finally made it! I’ll go outside to look at tornadoes, but driving on ice is not for me.

  2. LilMondu

    February 26, 2013

    I <3 this woman. Hilarity. “@katyinacorner: Just one of the many reasons I should not be allowed to leave the house. http://t.co/imt5W30MSi”

  3. Katy B

    February 26, 2013

    Once we were snowed in for four days, and on the last day I drank the last can of Pepsi we had. At that point, I was ready to craft snowshoes and walk the 10 miles to town, for a 12 oz can of crisp, refreshing, Pepsi. Lucikly, the snow let up and my husband was able to make it to town…and save me from caffeine withdrawal 🙂 Also, the minute my husband hears the words “No Travel Advised,” he feels compelled to hop in the pick-up and travel somewhere…we were once the only people in Wal-Mart besides the few employees who made it to work.

  4. angelashelton

    February 26, 2013

    Oh my my my my my. There is SO much in here that I just have to say yay that you made it home safely and gosh darn I’m proud of your use of photos. 🙂

  5. Pingback: Operation Hazmat | (Nobody Puts) Katy in a Corner

  6. Pingback: In Case You Don't Hear from Me for a While | (Nobody Puts) Katy in a Corner

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