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My Professional Background - Once upon a time, I wanted to be a motivational speaker. Actually, I was a professional motivational speaker for about 5 years.:

Monthly Archives

October 2012

I decided to take the kids on an impromptu trip to Atlanta today to participate in my parents’ Halloween tradition of scaring the living MESS out of the neighborhood children. In his prop arsenal this year, my dad (he calls himself “G-man”) has a life-sized coffin and my old, bald mannequin, Demi. I got her in high school when the film G.I. Jane was popular (hence the name). Demi really comes in handy on Halloween.

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This is my fourth and final interview in the series called “How to Win the Election.”

Here, I’m with grassroots candidate Roseanne Barr. Unfortunately, her busy schedule couldn’t allow her to weed out other engagements just to fit us in, so we conducted this interview over the phone.

Still, I believe it was one of the best. I certainly gained the most from this interview, and I assume you will as well.

Just watch this and tell me your mind isn’t changed…

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One of our favorite comedians, Jim Gaffigan, talks about his wife’s tendency to keep loads of pillows on their bed – as if they’re “stockpiling ammo for the global pillow fight.” I have to laugh every time I hear this because I was conceived by such a woman.

My friends, take a look at this arsenal:

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I don’t know why they do it, but people often ask this question:

If your house was burning, what items would you save?

First of all, why the morbid question? Second of all, I don’t want the insurance you’re selling. And third of all, my hard drive. (Because I can’t help but answer a good, morbid question.) Read more →

I found a fun, new way to creep out your neighborhood, Starbucks barista!

After my hubby got home from his class this afternoon, I decided to go grab a coffee and head to the grocery store – alone. Believe me, after a cross-country flight to Atlanta and a scream-filled road trip to Montgomery, Alabama, I needed some solo time.

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I once got my entire family (grandparents, parents, aunts, uncles and cousins) kicked out of Walmart.

Do you know how difficult it is to get kicked out of Walmart? Have you seen People of Walmart?

I don’t think they would even kick out a vengeful leper carrying a rabid armadillo. But we sure got kicked out…all because of me.

Here’s the Reader’s Digest version of what happened:

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Update:  The winner of the Romney Chia Pet is…

LilMondu:  “Chicken, onions, mushrooms, bell peppers, Roma tomatoes. On a pizza from Papa John’s. With garlic dipping sauce. Yum!

Congratulations! Contact us via the contact page to claim your prize.

Original Post:

If you’re at all like me, you’re beside yourself with excitement about tonight’s final Presidential debate.

The only things I enjoy more than a lively Presidential debate are indigestion, media bias and people blocking me on Facebook because of my commentary.

So. Pumped.

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During the Presidential debate this past Tuesday, a Facebook friend of mine – actually, she’s a real, live friend of mine who lives across the street – appropriately identified some of her Facebook friends as “armchair politicians.” She’s referring to those who have never played the politics “game,” yet they seem to have so much to say about it.

I happen to like her analogy.

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Is that the dirty laundry that stinks?

No…

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