Guyyyyyyyys, WHERE have you been? I’ve been looking everywhere for you!
[Huh? Wait a minute…SHE'S the one who didn't post anything for a week! So, why is she looking for us?]
I’m confused. Have you been looking for me?
[Why does she keep having these stupid conversations with herself?]
Have y’all seen my medication lately?
As you may have already read, we had a garage sale recently.
[Really? I didn't notice an entire week's worth of annoying, melodramatic garage sale posts.]
I get your point.
But I’m here to talk about the aftermath of that traumatic experience.
Continue reading “One Woman’s Trash” »
I can probably count on one hand the number of times I have experienced buyer’s remorse. I happen to be rather opinionated (“RATHER?!?!?!?,” says my husband), so I don’t usually waffle back and forth when I shop.
It’s almost like JJ knows how very, very particular I am about my calendar and said, “Hey, Averi, you know what would be reeeeeeeally hilarious? If I took a PEN and colored all over mom’s calendar. On the first day of the month. Bwahahahahahahahaha!”
And that’s how it happened.
I’m sure of it.
I read a book once called Men are like Waffles—Women are like Spaghetti, and it was probably one of THE cheesiest (no pun intended) books I’ve ever read. But the points the authors, Bill and Pam Farrel, made were both interesting and pretty hilarious.
If you read my post last Friday you know that our weekend was a fun-filled one. (Read heavy on the sarcasm.)
I mean, who wouldn’t want to spend 12 hours cleaning out the garage and another 14 hours haggling with strangers about how much they should pay for box upon box of once-treasured memories?
I had a colonoscopy once. And it was more fun.
Most of my childhood was spent fantasizing about the day I would make my living as a television star. I can’t even count how many inspired scenes and acceptance speeches I rehearsed in my bathroom mirror.
I just never thought my television debut would result from something as ordinary as a garage sale.
Look for me on the next episode of Hoarders.
People frequently ask me questions about the business side of blogging and how we justify the time and money we pour into it.
And by people, I mean the IRS.
Just kidding, y’all. We’ve never been audited.
[Until she was dumb enough to put that in writing.]
Seriously, though, I’ve had several friends and family members ask me questions about how we justify the time we spend on a business whose quarterly report resembles that of a neighborhood lemonade stand…in February.
I have a love-hate relationship with Pinterest.
Few things undermine my sense of accomplishment as a mother, housewife and overall human being more than that ridiculous website. And, yet, I’m still enthralled with it. (That grumpy cat sucks me in every time.)
Pinterest tells us, “Hey, you want to plan a baby shower for a friend? Here are just a few clever ideas…”